Men and Masturbation - It's Really Important!

 Why do men masturbate?  Why do men masturbate so often?  Do all men masturbate?  I think it's very important to talk about men and masturbation very early on the life of this blog.  I think this is a foundational topic and critical to understand in a submissive male/submissive husband relationship.  Understanding our motivations to masturbate can help us as submissives and more importantly, our Dominant, especially if that person is a woman.

Obviously I can't speak for all men and can only relate my own experiences and maybe some things other men have shared with me, but I suspect a lot of men will be able to relate to these thoughts.

First, let me establish I'll be talking in what I believe are the overwhelming majority of men, not rare exceptions.  So in answering the question, do all men masturbate, I'll say yes.  And they've all been doing it for a long time.  Some start sooner than others, but all men have been pleasuring themselves since rather young ages.  And yes, it continues even when we're in committed relationships.

I know a lot of women have negative feelings about their partner's masturbation habits and they shouldn't.  Provided the overall relationship is good, women should not feel insecure about or resent the fact that their man masturbates.  It really is just a thing we do.

This answer would've likely been different twenty or thirty years ago but today I would estimate that I masturbated out of pure sexual desire only about 50-60% of the time.  And when I say pure sexual desire I mean I was already horny before I jacked off, not that I made myself horny so I could jack off.  Yes, we do that too.

For a large part of our lives, masturbation has been something we do for myriad reasons.  It is calming, comforting, and a means of coping.

Bored?  Masturbate.  Have anxiety?  Masturbate.  Nervous or insecure?  Masturbate.  Can't sleep?  Masturbate.

Again, when I was younger, the testosterone was flowing a lot heavier and I was a lot hornier so that ratio would be different for 25 year old me vs. 55 year old me.  But, even so, all those other reasons for masturbating were still present and very real.

Masturbating is the one thing we have full control over.  We can fantasize about anything we want, allow our deepest secrets to come forward.  It's just ourselves and the outside world can't be a part of it.  There's no insecurities, inadequacies, or external negativity.  It's a much more powerful act than we may realize.

It's physical, mental and yes, emotional.

Losing control over our freedom to masturbate is a very, very big deal.  It is well beyond sexual.  It is giving up a part of ourselves.  It's losing our security blanket and in some sense, our independence.  And yeah, there's the sexual aspect too and that is no small thing either.

And obviously, the longer we go without masturbating, the more impactful it is.  Fold in, imposed orgasm control and/or chastity, and the submissive subject will undoubtedly be affected and it can be profound. 

So why would some of us volunteer to give up this most precious activity?  Well, that is a complicated question that is best explored in other posts.  But if you're a Dominant and your submissive does propose it, I would highly encourage you to explore it.  And if your sub doesn't offer it, I would still consider implementing it in some fashion.  Perhaps start with short sessions and gradually expand it.  It can make so many other things so much easier.

A chaste subbie make, especially a chaste husband, is an obedient and attentive sub indeed.  😌